You know what time of the year it is; the weather is getting colder, one gets more reflective, but above all we feel thankful. But do we all truly actively express thanks for the breaks life gives us when we feel at a crossroads.

To be actively thankful isn’t an inconsistent habit—it is essential. In fact, it is times where we feel life’s pressure the most when we have the most to gain by a grateful perspective on life. In the face of demoralization, to be thankful for the ability to continue through such a time in life has the power to energize. In the face of brokenness, to be thankful gives one the power to heal. In the face of despair, being thankful also has the power to bring hope. In other words, the key to maintaining positivity is having the capacity to proactively be thankful for the good recurrent and present things in your life.

Don’t get me wrong. I am not suggesting that in the face of crisis one immediately can respond in just looking for things to be thankful for all the time. It’s easy to feel thankful for the good things. No one “feels” thankful that he or she has lost a job or a home or good health or has taken a devastating hit on his or her retirement portfolio.

But it is vital to make a distinction between feeling thankful and being thankful. We don’t have total control over our emotions. We cannot easily will ourselves to feel thankful, less depressed, or happy. Feelings follow from the way we look at the world, thoughts we have about the way things are, the way things should be, and the distance between these two points.

But being thankful is a choice, a prevailing attitude that endures and is relatively immune to the gains and losses that flow in and out of our lives. When disaster strikes, it provides us the opportunity to develop a new perspective – A perspective from which we can view life in its entirety and not be overwhelmed by temporary circumstances.