“Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.” – Proverbs 22:6
I’m a pastor’s kid. That title can trigger different thoughts for different people. One popular thought is that a pastor’s kid – or PK – is someone who resented their position growing up, and wanted nothing more than to leave home and go to college, where they would be free to run wild – no longer “held back” by strict parenting informed by religious tradition. For many PK’s, that was their reality…but not mine.
For me, growing up as a PK didn’t mean extra pressure to behave in public, or a childhood filled with resentment toward my parents and faith. Did I have moments? Sure. But more than anything, being a PK meant I had a cheat code at home. I had a man at home that I could ask questions about the Word. I had a man at home that led his household in the way of the Lord. I had a man at home that walked the walk, sacrificing his time, will and body to make sure he was providing for his family.
I had a man at home that I watched work 12 hour night shifts, then come home to take a quick power nap, and get ready to go to church and preach on a Sunday morning. I had a man that would teach Bible studies on Wednesday nights, then change into his scrubs in the bathroom after service because he had to go to work from there. There was no time to come back home.
Growing up a PK came with real challenges for me when it came to identity. I wanted to be like the other kids but saw how my faith and convictions made that difficult for me. Yet I still never abandoned my faith. NEVER. NOT FOR ONE DAY. And today, I can look back and attribute much of that resilience to the fact that no matter how difficult things were at school, I had to come home each day, back into “the system.” In our home, we worshiped God. Every night, we prayed together as a family. Every Saturday morning, we prayed and sang hymns as a family. Every Sunday, we went to church as a family. In all that we did, God was never our mean overlord waiting to judge us after we sin. He was always a gracious, loving, Provider who we could depend on.
My dad (and my sweet mother) gave my siblings and I a system. A routine to acknowledge God’s role and relevance in our lives. You see, my dad is not a perfect man. But he is a principled man. He is a man that lives on Biblical principles that he refuses to negotiate. And this is how he led his household. My dad taught me what it looked like to be hard-headed for Jesus.
No negotiations. No compromises. Why would there be? I see it in me today. And when you live a life hard-headed for Jesus, you realize that’s an impossible thing to do without sacrifice and hard work. Like I said, my dad was and is not a perfect man, but him and my mom were the first cases of humans I saw that taught me that believing in Jesus didn’t stop with belief. It starts there, and continues on with action.
This past Friday, my dad turned 72. Today I serve under him at our church. He is the Head pastor and I am the Youth Pastor. I “carry his bags” if you will, assisting in any and everything that he needs. I am grateful for the example my father gave me growing up. His example never made me run away from God, but run toward Him. I’m proud to say that I believe his hard-headedness has rubbed off on me. And I hope to rub it off on my kids, and anyone that reads this, and anyone that listens to the podcast, and anyone I ever meet and share the gospel with. We all should be hard-headed about Jesus, not satisfied with merely serving him in word but also in deed.
Proverbs 22:6 says instructs parents to “Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.” My dad is not a perfect man, but he might have ate that one little thing.
